~Ooops..~

I did a major no no this morning.. I had just gotten a cup of coffee,

it was sitting here in front of me while I looked at my email .. I had

taken a sip, and thought to myself that perhaps I would see about

getting a brand new one as this really wasnt hot hot coffee.. I set

the cup back down, between me and the keyboard, arm on each

side..ive done this before.. I went to reach for the cup to take

another drink and didnt raise my hand up high enough, and hit the

cup of coffee knocking it over onto the desk and into my lap. It

wasnt HOT HOT..I did have to stop for a minute as it did take my

breathe away, it had gotten mostly on my left stump..between my

legs,and part of the left and of course my stomach..my cushion

is still soaked..I had my skirt on and it was dripping wet. it ALL

went on me, not a drop even got on the floor. If it had been hotter
I could be in very serious trouble..thankfully Im not. my right stump

and of course my belly are red..the left is a little but not bad..it did

a direct hit on the right.its tender.my poor cushion will never dry.lol

Ive been having some serious conversations about the Dev issue....

which to me should not be, but it really is. It does affect so many that

arent even aware of it.. I have a friend said " I am going to quit being

a dev" Honey, you cant.. . . . just sit back and enjoy the ride...lol.. In

the past few days, why I have no idea..but 2 dear friends..have said

they have to 'back away, then its the "its not you, its me" No..that is

NOT so! it is ME as well..it affects me..it makes me feel bad .. I have

feelings too.. Why do I have to be left out because of who and what I

am... Yet..I can understand..especially if the dev is married. . what I

think many dont see,, is that I am NOT a threat..to anyone..no.. I
could be friends with a Devs wife..IF she would let me! I would try
to help her to understand..to try to explain that its the same sort of
thing as being intrigued by horses or women with other good body
attributes..or any kind of thing that YOU are interested in..

Maybe since I am new at being a DAK, well its only 5 yrs..thats still

new...I can see both sides. a wife, or husband would feel threatened

by anything that took any kind of attention away from them. I think
so.. I mean my ex and his hunting drove me NUTZ . He had to have
ALL his camo clothes the same material now..ALL had to match
from his pillow he sat on to the cap on top his head....like you KNOW
the deer fashion police will get you lol...its the same thing..and
MONEY? wow..THAT is a VERY VERY expensive habit..specially
when you have to have a gun for every kind of season, small arms,
shotgun, rife, blackpowder and of course his favorite BOW hunting.
So whats the difference? A man, or woman even, collects photos of
amputee women? I see no difference my ex could sit and watch
hunting videos for hours..we didnt have a computer but his mom
did and she put a hunting thing on for him well guess where he
stayed when we went over there? see what I mean?

This does bother me though and I really try hard to explain it..and I
try hard to understand it .. I get so MAD sometimes..and I try very

hard not to..and see both sides of why some people do this.. I dont

think that it will ever be resolved..because we are all so different..

and there are good and bad in everything.. Im not saying my friends

decisions are bad ones..by no means..This is what they felt they had

to do..only THEY know what is best for them..Best for me..would be

to not lose them.but..well..this is NOT my doing.its theirs..and their

choice and their loss.. Heyyyy Im GORGEOUS here.. *wink* lol

After slopping coffee all over me, I got up at 5:30..every day this
week I have been getting up before the birds...I went and crawled
up on my bed and took a long nap..slept from about 930 to 1 ..and
sound asleep..woke up with the boys right next to me, so i really
didnt do alot today other than try to figure some peoples kids out
lol. People are just people..gotta luv em.. some I could just SMACK!
but..well...I am always here..and I dont hide..my mail is posted..so..
I can be reached anytime. :-) I hope they keep in touch.. I did get
a post from a dear sweet friend in Chicago..was so very nice to hear
from him again it has been a long time. hes been missed was so nice
to know all is well by him..dear man, and I was pleased he left a
comment..see? its easy to stay in touch with me lol...NOT that IM
easy now lol.. I have a nice pumpkin doughnut out in the kitchen
with my name on it.. I keep ice tea in the fridge (can) and I put it
into a cup, warm it..and have HOT tea! easy..no sloppy tea bags lol.
and with a doughnut, works for me!

Hope I didnt rag but well .. i get in these snits..so bare with me :-)
and its an interresting subject.. . . dont ya think?

Nitey Nite :-)

Y'all have a good one now Y'hear? luv ya..and thanks.. :-)

Always, Lois ****

God Bless you is my prayer today,

I'm so honored to call you "friend";

I pray the Lord will keep you safe

until I write again..