~Im Being Good~

Ive been good taking my pills, I took them at noon I was late

today. A little while after I took them I HAD to take a nap..I

was sitting here are realized I had fallen asleep here at the

keyboard. It has to be the tranquilizers or something.. Ive not

fallen asleep like this since I have been in the hellhome.. These

are really good..just put me right to sleep..I took my BP when I got

up and its just fine...so thats not a worry but this tiredness has to

be the anti depressant I dont know if I like this..and shes going to

increase the dose? Over 3 weeks its to be increased.. When the

nurse comes to help I will know more..I bet tomorrow I will get the

call setting up the nursing visits, and I will tell her..

I didnt do a whole lot of anything today talked to a dear friend for a

while. which I always enjoy.. and looked that photo up top totally

checking it out.. There are 3 women perhaps..we figured one was

a child or something as the are not in order on the tombstone. The

dates on it are extremely old..We inspected it very carefully trying

to guess who or what and why did I have this photo? The tombstone

is wonderful..but if you examine the photo it looks like it is sitting on

a slab of something..and there is a pile of dirt next to it.. And look at

the flowers on there they look dead and bent, and the names and

years of death they're not in order.. Its an interesting photo..we

discussed it thoroughly..was fun and I enjoyed trying to figure out what

was what on it.. I have no idea about it at all ...but was fun trying to

guess at everything..:-)

Its amazing how this friend and I can talk about anything at all

its so nice not to have to watch my words and feelings..to be

able to share every detail of my life, talk about anything else

that we happen to think of..news stuff or things we've done..

adult feelings and emotions..there is not one subject that is

taboo for us to talk about and discuss..and we find that is just

the most wonderful thing..and I think so too.. We are both

extremely honest with each other and we say how we really

feel about the subjects we talk about.. which not alot of people

can actually say they can do.. I have been told before that I am

very easy to talk to..and that they do enjoy the fact that they CAN

discuss what ever feelings they have about any thing in the

world.. I enjoy that too.. I find being honest..and open,, and saying

what I think is one of the reasons someone can talk to me so

openly about anything.. I like it..especially the honesty part...if

you cant be honest and say what you think and feel well then why

talk to someone..

I dont mind discussing my amputations..and how they really feel

I think I have told things here that not too many have said.. But ,

well its me.. I dont mind.. I have not a thing to hide being an

amputee is just a way of life..I have lost 2 legs..yes.. and I dont

mind telling just how NOT fun this is.. and what it feels like to be

like this, and how I got this way and why..I think the most interesting

thing that most ask is just what it feels like, and the problems I

face daily.. and how hard this life really is..LORD is ever !!! :-)

but its doable.. Some days..wow..I mean I actually .. honestly

HATE this chair and being in it.. when that is not true ... I really love

it and am SO very grateful I have it!!! Id be stuck for sure..I would

be bed bound and I wont do that.. until I just cannot get around at

all..Im steady doing something..

Speaking of doing something..well.. I did something.. And I was so

pleased with the reaction I got ..Last nite I phoned my ex mother in

law ,, Karalee.... I told her I had some things of Davids here and I

would like to get them to him.. She was SO happy I phoned..and

scolded me for not being in touch all this time..That she had tried to

find me..but forgot my sisters last name and didnt have the vaguest

idea how to reach me.. Said she thought of me all the time..She

has many many memories there at her house to remind her of me

that I made especially for her..I asked how David was and he is

not doing the greatest.. that he is married to a Mexican woman

and has a daughter.. David will make a wonderful father..he LOVES

children.. But sadly she said he is NOT in the greatest of shape ..

I was so saddened to hear that he has gone down hill.. BUT I

was so pleased with Karalees reaction and I am so glad I finally

did phone her.. I also phoned his sister at Karalees request.. She

said "We still love you Lois, you were a part of our family for a long

time, and we still love you, please call Jen and say hello" I guess

Jen is having a bit of a rough go..and will be going to the Mayo

clinic soon..Karalee..and Jen will be up to visit as soon as possible

she said..and I have to admit ..I am SO GLAD they are coming here.

NOW do Raelynn and I have our work cut out for us..I want this place a

bit more than squeaky..I need PERFECT lol..No not really they wont

notice..but I want it that way so they see i really am ok.. She said how

worried they have been since they found out I am in the condition

im in and were very worried about me.. I was so GLAD I called..I was

so afraid all this time they were mad at me.. what a wonderful phone

call that was..

Well its time to take the last of my pills and I Have gone on long

enuff its time to end this post and find that publish button.. I havent

eaten today and I do need something..So I will raid my freezer and

see what I can find, I have NO idea what I am hungry for..I know

one thing that sounds good..NO NO not my fav, fries n gravy either..

a good Peanut butter n jelly sandwhich with banana slices on it..I

love that.. its really good..That was all I ate for a long time when I

was in hospital my sis told them all I would eat was Tomato soup

and a PB & J sandwich lol..was true too.. I have the PB & J but

no banana.. :-(..I will find something good..I have NO doubts LOL..

Time to say Nitey Nite...and sweet dreams...

Y'all have a good one now Y'hear? I luv ya and Thanks.. :-)

ALways, Lois ****

God Bless you is my prayer today,

I'm so honored to call you "friend";

I pray the Lord will keep you safe,

Until I write again....