~Im Burning Not the CD~

Everyone is so busy now days trying so hard to make a living

its really sad that its gotten so hard..no one has time to just take

a break and enjoy their life.. I guess I am very fortunate that I can

spend all the time I want on the computer or doing what ever I please

I need to be very grateful.. I will admit I do forget that some people

have full lives and many things to do,, I guess I have things I NEED to

do but just cant do them , like cleaning for one,or re arranging things..

I was so mad yesterday, I cant reach the wall behind the sink, I wanted

to hang a mirror there, I get so frustrated at that sort of thing then I get

very discouraged and get into a snit and say why try at all.But well then

why play this life game if you are afraid to TRY it? Do the best you

can, and just keep trying to improve it..

I have been seriously considering moving I am happy with my

apartment, I really like it and It could be fixed up so cute if I had the

ways and means to do it, I can, just take time and effort..but its doable

I just am so unhappy with the location..I see nothing out my windows

now..just a parking lot..If I go out to the patio down by the conference

room I see parking lot and a nasty place never cleaned , if I go out the

main door, I see parking lot...Its such a sad location for such nice apart-

ments.They could fix it so we could have some private spot outside

for each of us..but they choose not to..we cant even put things outside

because of the yard maintenance, he has to be able to just cut across the

grass and the sidwalk with out flowers etc sitting there...ITs a shame.. I

had my computer in my other bedroom and I liked it there I could see

out side, but then nothing to see but cars parked out there now, I wish I

could find a nicer outdoors. I miss my garden and my lanai so much.. I

sat out every day and nite,, even in the rain sometimes. You know how in

the summer its so very hot and suddenly this nice warm rain comes down

and just refreshes and cools..you can almost see the steam rising

from the concrete and grass as the cool mist lowers the heat...The fresh

smell to the air, and the wonderful quiet, everything seems to just COOL

and take a deep breathe and sit and just relax..those were such good

times..I miss that..ALOT.

Of a morning I would get my coffee, and a carafe full and climb the steps

up to my lanai..and would make a round of all my flowers, checking each

one.. noticing if any special care was needed..feeling the dampness of the

morning dew on each one I touched.. I loved to see my little snap dragons

all bright and cheerful smiling up at me as if to say "look at ME, arent I

JUST the prettiest?" I had yellow, salmon, pinks, just lovely, The trellis

held my morning glories as I climbed the steps (I lived in a condo)I would

scan the bottom of the glories checking the dirt and tucking in any new

stragglers... I would walk around the end, and check out the front and see

all the delicate flowers blooming just that one morning just for me, all the

colors..Glories only bloom one day you know..I felt they each deserved

the attention every day from me if they were generous enough to bloom

for me even only just the ONE day, they replaced the ones gone every

day, and it just stayed blooming all summer. In the center I had a purple

Clematis.. when that beauty starts to bloom you can only just stand back

and just savor the glory of all the dozens of blooms it gives you..all with

that delicate yellow star in the center Just lovely. The daisies I planted in

front ..just standing tall..enjoying the dampness of the dew and early rays

of the sun...and my roses? Just wonderful.. Every morning i would scan

my flowers..drink my coffee and listen to the sounds of the day starting,

feeling the air warming from the heat of the sun as it rose, listening to
the birds telling me all happily as they jump from the birdbath to the
bird feeder for their daily breakfast-"ok..we got another day here to use.
whats on for today" - just enjoy that you have another day to Live again.

Well I just went on didnt I? lol...I was just mentioning to Donnies Mom,

Barb, she is a EXCELLENT cook..Chef level...about how I miss cooking

like I used to when Donnie and Kimmie, Kelli of course, and no telling

who else would drop by seemed always conveniently at supper time like

Kenny or Julio..I enjoyed it though..Only was hard when I wasnt really

prepared to have to keep stretching something when well there wasnt a

whole lot more could be added to make a meal larger lol..But I did enjoy

that.. I do like to cook...I look at the grocery ads in the paper and think of

all the meals that I had prepared, now being alone. that is just such alot

of very hard preparation work that would just wear my arms out totally

having such a high work surface. I really havent figured out a easy way to

do major cooking to roll in a chair is so much different than just taking a

step to be able to reach something..for me it may be 2 or 3 times having

to move If my wheels are pointed the wrong way or I have to back up.
then turn, then rolll.then back up.turn and roll back..where someone
standing it could mean only stretching and one small side step...Big
difference..Plus the fact..I have short arms or these are awfully wide
counter tops and I know they arent as its a standard double sink, if I
was taller I would be ok.Its really amazing I had seen many people
before in chairs and even thought well riding is ok..not realizing ALL
the limitations involved with it there are so many...

Next time Raelynn comes and I am going to the potty I am hope Dutch

will get up on it with me and maybe she can get a picture of this
perverted cat.. I got the funniest video I laffed so hard But this little
dog was going to town on this stuffed bear, and I mean just jumping all
over..and it reminded me of this cat of mine LittleBoy, thats just what
he does.Its so funny.He will start to howl and cry and the next thing
I know hes dragging his stuffed cat and then mounts this thing and
goes to town..Its hilarious..I wake up with all 3 of these cats..and I hate
when I reach out and I touch this stuffed one..ewww I am VERY careful
how I handle that "cat" Im afraid to wash it for fear it will fall apart, 3
yrs now hes dragged this poor thing around and if something happened
to her he would be most upset. I took pictures of him once and I put
them together as kittie porn lol..was so cute I will have to do that again,
he really loves her,and takes very good care of her, drags her to his food
dish, Ive found her in by the litterbox even.. hmmm so THATS who
messes outside the box ..lol no no my boys are very neat..VERY sloppy
eaters..but Raelynn and I were in the kitchen yesterday,, and we
watched Dutch scoop out a piece of his hard food and just slap it all
over the kitchen then go back and get another, I had just told her that
ook how this food gets so scattered.NOW we know why!!! Was funny, I
get ants in the kitchen if the food is not picked up, why I am so picky,
well there was a trail of cat food that led right up to the ant trap we had
put out to stop these little buggars.I looked at that and thought well now
that stupid ant must have stopped in that trap thinking something better
was in there..lol..Little things amuse us here.

Well I had lunch and I'm not hungry so no kitchen stop..I guess the boys

know this since they are over on the bed already lol.. I'll finish my email

then I will be headed over that way myself...:-) I am really tired..I bid
you all a nitey nite..:-)

Y'all have a good one now Y'hear..Luv ya & thanks !!

ALways, Lois****

May God Bless you today,

I'm so honored to call you friend,

I pray the Lord will keep you safe,

Until I write again...