~Ok. This IS PAIN~

I have a pain. I honestly CANT understand HOW this is possible. My right invisible shin..the front part..has the most HORRIBLE pain in it ALL day.. So bad it makes me cringe.. THAT is how bad this is hurting ..I put my hand over the end of my stump and tell myself..REALLY concentrating that THIS is NOT possible.. It does NOT work.. I have been up since 3 am..because of this CRAP.. My head cannot be working.. If I cant accept that this part of my leg is GONE...well then I must be NUTZ.. I have not EVER had phantom pain this bad as I have had today... I have shifted and moved around so much even Raelynn noticed that I was very fidgety..and asked what was wrong.. I told her I have ants in my pants.. no.. I told her its the Phantoms are SUPER bad...I was told..all sorts of different things about them, from Doctors to other amputees.. But the one alike symptom was they will NEVER stop. I asked If we were supposed to have storms today or something.. but only just a little rain..but then again..that could mean anything..we had a tornado touch down about 30 miles from here..to a tornado 30 miles is VERY close. I have had my Air Conditioner on for the past 3 days..it has been so hot here.. Its been awful..then a storm pops up and it hails..one place had golf ball size hail, I saw that on tv just the other day.. I dread the thought that this air is going to have to be on most of the time..if I dont keep it on it gets so hot in here...then all I do is worry about the electric bill..cant win for losing here it seems...Summer storms worry me though..no basement and the tornados seem more frequent and closer than in other years... I lived before with my ex just a little south west of here..about maybe 60 or so miles.. takes about little over an hour to get there..where my sis lives.. and I moved there in 83.. so the weather there is pretty much the same area..and these storms are getting more severe.. There would be no way we could even get down to a basement..if we had one..unless they put in an elevator..or a ramp..couldnt you see a bunch of panicked wheel chair people flying down a ramp into a basement? THAT would be cute..all piled up at the bottom.. and all of us dragging our animal carriers with us.. I dont think anyone here doesnt have a cat or a dog..well except Penny, she doesnt..The residents I do know here .they do...Raelynn has 3. Dutch just loves her and she plays with him all the time..She is amazed at the difference between my boys.. there is NO other cat like Dutch.. I feel sorry for Raelynn...she lives with a sister she obviously loves that has a son that is NOT of the best character..and not one that gets along with people..She said how she has no privacy..they invade her room...and thats so not right.. She is so nice, she is going to start looking for a place.. She has to be able to get something that allows pets.. which.. are pretty hard to find.. I hope she does.. I did advise her NOT to say how many cats she has..Very seldom does the apt managers go into your apt..The one here does only if you have a complaint, then its not for months later. She planted a garden she said as well.. Her sister owns a Mobile home..here in town...so they can have a garden... I think if the son moved out it wouldnt be so bad there for her but the odds of that happening are very slim... I wish I could win the lottery and buy that big place out here by the lake..Now THAT would be a good thing. It has alot of potential of what can be done with it.. and I sure would buy that 15 acres or buy that bus if I won the lottery..But.. I guess to WIN the lottery ..you gotta play it! and I dont..hmmm.. Guess I better change that hey? specially if I want that bus or lake property..well If I won a super BIG lottery I could have BOTH lol... This invisible HORRIBLY achy painful leg has NOT stopped and I am just going to have to get out of this chair for a while and hope it stops.. I have NEVER had phantoms this bad as today...Just amazes me.. Im all squeaky clean here for the week end..I got some food..now I get this to stop hurting I might have a good week end.. Maybe my phone will ring... I love when it does and its NOT a telemarketer LOL.Time to hit PUBLISH. Nitey Nite... Y'all have a good one now Y'hear? LUV ya!!! and Thanks :-) Always, Lois**** May God Bless you today, I'm so honored to call you friend, I pray the Lord will keep you safe, Until I write again...