~What To Write~

I am sitting here thinking about what Im going to write about

today, since today was like..Wednesday or last monday..one

of Penny's days that shes here.. I got to thinking how these

days are pretty much alike.. she has a routine when she comes

that she goes thru.. The bathroom, then the kitchen.. dusting,

she knows how dust on my lamps drives me insane.. just a

glitch I have :-) then she will do the floors or vacuum off the sofa.

And always a trip to DQ or to the store too if I need something

for over the weekend.. She wont be back until Monday. during

the week Donna comes by every day at noon.. so I see some

one every day.. And when Donna comes she is supposed to

sort of check on us..They are to make sure we answer or they

see us when they come by... And here, well no one makes it

in and out with out being inspected by the boys anyway...

I have to say since I have my thyroid pills back I feel a bit better.

Not as tired as I was.. Well I do get really pooped by the after

noon anyway.. well to be honest, my BUTT does.. or my hips.

If I sit the wrong way for too long.. my stumps let me know by

going instantly tingly.. well that sleeping feeling.. everyone has

had that.. My stumps if I sit the wrong way for too long will go

to sleep.. specially my right one.. When she isnt asleep its like

I am instantly aware she isnt because she stayed asleep for

so long.. I thought it was the way they were supposed to feel..

Did you notice what I wrote? I refer to my stumps as SHE's...

well theyre mine.Sometimes though. I do call them everything but

what they are, they're aggravating me so bad.. Some times

the phantoms get hold..and to me the phantoms are the ice

pick stabs.. those really hurt.. and I always get them in my

heels.. or my big toe or along the side of my foot.. I feel every

bit of my feet and toes...and my legs too..but the distance I

feel now between my knee and the bottom of my foot feels

shorter..my feet now..hanging down..reach the top of my

small tire in the front.. not flat on it.. its shorter but if I point

my toes down, I can put them on top of the grey tire.. :-)

Really.. Its so hard to describe.. because I KNOW this feeling

really isnt there.. I can even put my hand over the end, and

it doesn't matter.. well my legs go right through my mattress

when I am laying on my bed.. THATS a weird feeling too!

its like describing something from a Sci Fi movie :-) but its

really true..actually feeling this is whats weird.. :-) They didn't

tell me..but until you actually feel this you cant really KNOW

just what its like.. and as hard as I try to really describe it.. I

know im not really explaining it as to how it really feels.. I bet

though each of us feels this differently.. it cant be put into just

ONE type of feeling.. not since all amputees are different and

feel things differently... I honestly don't believe it when someone

says they are really actually HAPPY being an amputee. Im

happy I'm alive... :-)

Im alive, fairly well but certain parts of my anatomy are NOT happy,

and so that tells me its that time for me to get out of this chair

for today.. I got up early as it is my very Dear friends birthday,

Raife.. I had hoped to tell him on SKYPE . "Happy Birthday My

Dear Friend" :-) but as the day wore on and he was busy and I was-

we didn't get a chance..But Its his birthday today..Y'all wish him a

Happy Birthday too... :-) Time for my GORGEOUS WEEBLE
"Nitey Nite"... :-)

Y'all have a good one now, Y'hear? love ya..and THANKS ! :-)

Always, Lois ****

God Bless you, is my prayer today,

I'm so honored to call you "friend";

I pray the Lord will keep you safe,

Until I write again.....