~Things You Find~

I was cleaning out the drawer in the bathroom vanity
this morning and found the lidocaine and the other
solution they used to numb my left stump- when I had
that raging infection., I thought I had thrown them
away. I saw the date on them said 7-03-02... seems
like a century ago.But then on the other hand..seems l
ike only yesterday,I dont know why the memory of
pain seems to stay with you and something you just
cant seem to forget.I had 2 kinds of numby meds that
had to be injected which was not fun either. I hate
needles...3 years not seeing those things...but..
to see them again..I remember.

The nurse came 3 times a week, monday, wednesday

and fridays.. When I would wake up on those days

I would watch the clock and get more and more upset

knowing what was coming..specially on the days when

my stump wasnt hurting too bad..I dreaded the time.

By the time the nurse got here I was already a

basket case and upset knowing what was ahead.. I

knew the pain med would numb it, but in a few hours

I knew the pain would be even worse once it wore

off, because of touching and doing the dressing

change. There was no sleeping, eating, nothing, just

sitting and crying every day, wishing the pain would

go away just for a little while..

Its amazing how it did finally heal..I fired everyone

I just could NOT take any more.. I said I would take

care of it myself..And I did..just plain soap and water

gently over it..dressings every day..and that buggar

finally healed I think the day I looked and saw that

there was no hole there I cried again..realizing that

the pain was so much less. Hell of a time I'll tell ya..

But guess what??? I MADE IT~!~ lol :-)

My usual case worker, Becky, couldnt make it today
so another lady came named Diane..a sweetie. Very
understanding. I told her the circumstances about my
hours etc, and she is going to raise them.. I told her
RaeLynn just doesnt have time to do it all..but I said
right out I need more hours,she said "ill take care of
that as soon as I get back to the office" so hopefully

ill have more hours to give Rae, I think she will be
pleased, hope so.they will let me know. I told Diane I
don't mean to be a whiner, but I really could use more
time to have a little more done, she assured me I was
NOT a whiner that I was doing ok. Made me feel better,
I do really TRY,but sometimes I just cant quite do it. I
showed her the tips of my fingers that they seem to be
getting dark and that they tingle quite a bit- the more
I have to use my arms..the faster this moves. Hard to
explain...But they are dark, sometimes feel numb. Im
watching them closely.Thats all I would need is to lose
fingers! sheesh - HOW would I TYPE?? ohoh. they
have voice activated ones I think.I saw Ron type and
he had no hands..so its possible.

Got some groceries today, RaeLynn went shopping for

me, I didn't get junk food either..well..ok maybe a

couple snacky things..cookies..n stuff..ok ok and a

pizza lol..Raelynn picked up a couple burgers for us

for lunch I showed her what they brought and she didnt

know what it was either, so 3 guesses where it ended

up lol..Well, Im headed to get a soda and get off this

butt of mine for the day...Ive been up since 4:30 and

I am kinda pooped....Too pooped to pop as they say lol

My popper is pooped lol :-) boy, I must be tired lol..

Nitey Nite...:-)

Y'all have a good one now Y'hear? Luv ya..& thanks..

Always, Lois ****

May God Bless you today,

I'm so honored to call you friend,

I pray the Lord will keep you safe,

Until I write again...