~One Week :-(~

One week from today you may not see a post from me as that

is the day I have to be out of this apartment. The way it looks as

of today I have NO idea where I will be. None. the way it looks

right now, I will be sitting out in the parking lot. I just dont have

any idea where I will go. I have called every apartment complex

in this county, and no one has anything that I can even consider

getting into.There are such long waiting lists. Then To process

the paperwork takes at least 2 weeks...

I had hoped that I could get into Maple Towers, If I knew I could,

I would maybe then consider renting a motel room for a week and

wait to get in there. Poor Donnie and Dawn they offer but I just

cant access the bathroom in their house...I just dont know what to

do.. I have never been in this kind of situation before.. I called the

lady that helped me escape from the hellhome and she didnt even

have any ideas, no one does..I called the homeless shelter here,

and they dont even have any openings there for pete's sake!! This

is just so totally awful...and not one thing I can do since HUD wants

me out.. They wont even give me a 2nd chance..i just dont see being

that cruel.. but then..its the old saying..Money talks..BS walks...

Raelynn got about half of my sewing room packed today, she worked

really hard.. I should be so grateful..I have boxes all over now.. I think I

should sell that desk and maybe that stand up recliner..but I doubt If

I would get them sold in time.. I had thought about calling my brother,

but I dont know really what he could do..I dont think his house is ok

for me either.. My sisters I know isnt.. maybe I should just consider

going back to the nursing home.. I would have no more worries there.

No more troubles..But then no more life either, I may as well just die

to go back there.. That is really giving up..but I just dont know where

else to turn..

I know I am so very tired. I would love to just sleep, not worried sleep,

more awake than sleeping but I really wonder if I will ever be able to do

that again. My poor boys are upset, I can see in how they react to me,

They both follow me around, stick to me all the time. Bless their hearts,

they sure didnt ask but for a decent home. Im a bad mother..Such care
I take care of my kids.. I am so bad..


Time for this rotten mom to find the publish, and say Nitey Nite :-)

Hope your days are better than mine...

Y'all have a good one now Y'hear? luv ya..and thanks..

Always, Lois****

God Bless you is my prayer today,

I'm so honored to call you "friend";

I pray the Lord will keep you safe

until I write again..